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| Our character, Sena |
"I want rice and chicken."
Osei smiled. He had
her right where he wanted her. Quickly he waved the waiter over.
"Two plates of
fried rice, with chicken, please" he flicked his finger,
"Oh, and kindly add
a bottle of your finest wine. For the fine lady here,"
He gave that Cheshire
grin again.
The waiter hurried away and Sena settled into her seat, maybe this wasn't such a bad idea after all.
A MERE FIFTEEN MINUTES LATER...
She was fuming,
wishing this night over already!
When Maadjoa arranged
this date, she'd been vague about the details.
The
guy was rich, good-looking, he was a fine conversationalist, "stuff like
that," she'd said.
She'd
shrugged and gone back to the book she was reading.
And here she was now, stuck with this, this ... pig!
"Good-looking" had flown out the window the second their food arrived.
His lips were covered
in grease, and the beard he'd been sporting earlier now served as a dish-rag;
Sena could see traces of coleslaw in the curly hairs on his face.
He tried to speak
around the gulpful of wine in his mouth, pieces of chicken flying around the
table.
"Are you -
*swallow* - are you, having p - pun?"
Sena smiled. If this
joker thought she'd dare open her mouth while it was still raining chicken and
wine, he'd thought wrong.
What nonsense was
this?!
After what seemed like an eternity later, he grunted.
Then let out a vibrating belch.
The couple on the
next table turned to look. The woman shook her head, eyes sympathetic. The man
just looked annoyed.
"I've got to use the restroom. Excuse me, please." Sena did not wait for an answer.
She was putting on
finishing touches to her make-up when the woman from the table came in.
Joining her at the
sink, she smiled, shook her head again and spoke.
"Blind date,
eh?" at Sena's nod, she added.
"Those things
are like that. Sometimes, they're good. Other times, they leave you scarred and
bitter. I don't need to ask which one you're having." She laughed and continued,
"Keep pushing on.
That's how I met my Gary - after 7 horrible attempts."
She sighed and gave
Sena a pat on the back.
It seemed a bit too intense to be having this kind of a conversation with a stranger in a restaurant bathroom, but Sena needed all the encouragement she could get tonight.
"You're strong.
You'll get through it."
The lady entered one of the stalls and proceeded to
emit a fart so loud that Sena had to laugh.
This woman paah!
A quick whiff of the
air told her she'd be in the red zone soon. She cleared her throat.
"Thanks a lot,
errrh..."
The woman laughed
from within the stall,
"Adeline. My name is Adeline. And you'd do well to
get out of here - that Pad Thai they served is laced with *'kanwe', I swear
it!" and as if to drive home her point, another fart was released.
"It was n -
interesting meeting you, Adeline. Thanks for the advice," then she
escaped, one gassy hell to another.
The end?
NB: Most of the photos you'll see in this are credited to Pinterest: Black Women Art
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