BABYSITTING CLASS 101

HOW TO BABYSIT CRYING KIDS!
“Go on, louder!”

Shout at them, *It’s a challenge any kid is going to be up to. But then again, if he or she’s not going to stop when you tell them to, what’s the point? You might just score some points on the kid radar as the ‘adventurous’ one, encourage them to scream it all out.

“I’m out."

*Nothing a child loves to hear better than those words. Just leave them to it; they’re little attention—seekers who’ll rule your life with a whimper. Escape while you can!!!

*and while you're at it, catch up on your sleep!*

*You could always just be the typical African and paddle it outta them. This is where personal experience comes in, my parents just whooped all the stupidity out of me, and look, I’m just fine. (I think)

*Cry along with them.

If you give them a glimpse of just how ugly their contorted faces look like when they cry, you might just frighten them into submission. Trust me, nothing scares a kid better than an adult’s crying face! (Be creative, open the waterworks and introduce some snot and all)

This baby looks happy though...

*Pay them no attention. At all. They’ll stop when they will.

WHAT YOU WILL DO IF YOU’VE GOT A LICK OF SENSE…
*Co-operate!*
They occasionally cry for a valid reason. Occasionally.

*Show some love.*
Usually all the kid wants is a cuddle, or stick of gum, some toffee. Who knows?

*Don’t let them cry in the first place!*
Those sounds best atomic explosions. Protect your eardrums, you’ll need it when they’re teenagers and squealing over “5^th direction”.

Comments

MAMA

When realisation hit Torshie, she was drinking gari - a pinch of salt, some sugar. Her mother was dead. She blinked. She tried to remember why. What was making her remember? Was it the gari? She looked down at her meal. It was a white mix of cassava flakes; gari, water, sugar, some salt. The answer glared. There was no milk. No groundnuts. No love, Nothing. Then, and only then, did she cry. Rivulets of unshed steam and brine, pouring down her face. She touched them, amazed at where this pain and gut-wrenching feeling was coming from. She was crying hard. Crying for all those times she'd been clear-eyed. Making up for all those times she'd been obstinate - when she'd refused an opportunity to grieve freely without being judged. She saw the day Mama had died. Her bony body lying still, and she had not shed a single tear. The night before the fu...

AMAZEBALLS! ! !

Yay! Yay! Yipee! Hurray! *Ye da Nyame Ase o!* Today is a good day, people. Thank you all for the support. You guys – and girls – are amazing. Thank you for being amazing. And oh, did I mention you were amazing? We hit 500+ reads today! I should drink tea to celebrate. You should share the link to celebrate. *insert winking emoji* You rock. Seriously, you rock. P.S: On a more serious note though, thank you all for being so nice to me. You deserve a giant hug. And, if any of you is dealing with any difficulty today, please remember that there is a time and a season for everything under the sun – Ecclesiastes 3. Don’t forget that the Lord will never leave, nor forsake you, but with the temptation and/or trial, provide a way for escape. Trust God. Believe God. He’s never failed, and he sure won’t start now. Pretend I’m not low-key quoting Oceans right now ;) Proverbs 16:3-4 “ GOD made everything with a place and purpose...

)D) (EP 4)

Teejay was on cloud nine. Esinam had cornered him after prep last night. And as always, she had been brutally direct - something he admired her greatly for. Talking to her had been a problem because you see, Esinam was "hard". Really hard. And it didn't help that she was one of the best students in class. *After prep* His Gateway to English 1 was missing. Flustered, he waved his friends away, they could take the lead, he'll come by later. When he finally found the cursed book, it was wedged between his seat and Harry's. Good grief. He didn't notice her until she was right in front of him. "So you told Melanie to do *'betweener' for you eh?" She laughed that cute laugh. She realized how her laugh had echoed and looked around for any passers-by who might've overheard her. "Is it true what she said though?" – There was a long hiatus during which she lowered her head. ...

Nia

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